Zizou,

Yesterday we swam for the first time and it was amazing. We had a mini vacation in Palm Springs and it was cool because you had a life jacket and learned kind of how to swim. It was also the first day of the World Cup. Today was a great day tho we swam again and I didn’t have to worry too much about you because you were moving and swimming in your own.

We watched Portugal vs Spain and probably one of the best players to play the game C. Ronaldo play and score 3 goals. Beautiful

Anyways Z I’m trying to go to sleep. Love you to the moon and back. Mommy and I are very proud of you!!

Zebastian!!

We’re going to the world cup together in 8 years!! I’m happy and thankful that I’ll be able to share this experience with you and your grandfather Miguel and if you have another sibling he or she will come too!! My dad took me in 1994 and we watched Russia vs Cameron and I seen some guy score 5 goals in a game which was insane. I wanted to do that as soon as I got back home and playing and I did when we played in some league in Stockton. It was cool and a memory that I’ll never forget.

We’re going down south tomorrow and I couldn’t be more excited to have this mini vacation with the family. It’s gonna be Father’s Day on Sunday and I’m happy to be able to spend it with you. It’s gonna be a big day for me and a day that I’m sure I’ll never forget. You bring us all so much happiness and joy that you might not ever understand.

Anyways just wanted to say hello and I miss you!!

You’re gonna make it and I’ve said it since the first day you were born. You’re a fighter and a miracle!!

Love you,

Daddy

Zebastian,

First off I’m sorry for not writing you and keeping you posted on what’s been going on in our lives.

I recently graduated from my academy and that’s what’s been taking up all of my time and energy. This was the first time where I was really really proud of myself for accomplishing something because it was for you and your future. I’m one step closer to becoming full time and I couldn’t have done it with out you and mommy. Mommy has stepped it up a lot and I was obviously very happy with her because it was a sacrifice that you both made in order for me to do this.

My other job is over with and I’m happy that it is. I moved from my coordinator job to here to spend time with you and I knew it wasn’t going to last but I’m happy that it bought me enough time to be with you as much as I was.

We haven’t had a lot of things happening since the last time I wrote you. I think Easter which y’all spent down south but it was for y’all to spend time with your tata. We had your Grandpa David’s birthday the other day and he loved it. We went to the mission where mommy and daddy took pictures and it was really nice. We are very blessed to have them and to have had such an amazing weekend.

Today is game 3 of the Warriors vs Cavs and will watch it at home.

Other then that papa everything is A okay.

I love you very much and I can’t wait to hear that little voice inside of you come out.

You’re the love of our lives and couldn’t be happier with the young boy you are becoming.

Love and Respect,

Daddy

Z,

What’s good papa!? Well this is gonna be a short one. Just wanted to say hi and let you know that I love you and that you have a lot of people who love you. Right now Tia Diana is back for spring break and she’s spending a lot of time with you. I’m going on spring break and will be spending a lot of time with you too so I’m happy about that.

You have been sleeping around 11:30 every night because you been taking 2 hour naps around 4 or so.

Overall you are doing good. You are wearing some Js right now 4’s and aqua 8’s. I would think damn why am I buying these for him he only wear super comfy shoes like your nikes or pumas but they look good on you.

Mommy is doing good and she’s madly in love with you and it’s cool when we go to sleep we kiss you then you bring us both in to kiss you and it’s our routine when we go to sleep.

So far so good with your speech too you are saying more words and I’m very proud of you. I can’t wait to hear your little voice speak more and more.

I’m out papa, I’ll make sure to write you more next time.

Love You!!

Daddy

Papa,

I love you. You make everyday a blessing and I love waking up to you and mommy. I haven’t been around much cuz I’ve been grinding but I’m doing it for you and mommy. We wanna go on a vacation and we wanna have you there with us. I’m moving fields and am doing so with a heavy heart but doing it so I can spend time with you.

It’s been awhile since you used your chupon. We are slowly getting rid of the bottle and are gonna hopefully potty train you too. Your speech is coming along too.

We all watched COCO by the way and mommy and I cried. I cried because of my grandma and grandpa and my Tio. It made me think of them and how much they loved the family. It’s not easy but it’s the thing that I am the most scared of. That’s why I am writing you so that you know exactly how I think and why I do the things I do. My love for you papa is beyond words or items that I can buy you. I just want you to be humble and appreciate all the sacrifices that we’ve made for you.

Sorry that was off the topic but you love COCO and we bought you the guitar and you’re playing it but I give you a month before you break it or break something.

Okay papa well I love you to the moon and back and you’re getting big, hella long and strong and athletic.

Love you papa!

Love,

Daddy

Z,

I haven’t written you in over a month. Things are good. I’m busy and you are growing fast. I love you with all my heart and I hope you know it.

Let’s see, I had my birthday and you were asleep but I woke you up to blow out the candles.

You gave up your chupon with mommy’s help and are now talking a little More so that’s a good sign.

We went to Disneyland a few week ago and that was awesome.

Things are good overall. Your grandpa came to see you last week and he finally got to see the house. He has surgery and is now recovering.

Your grandma Paula had a scare that would have knocked me on my ass. Just makes me appreciate everything she’s done for me and how far I’ve came. She’s the rock to the family and I know if we would have lost her she would have been missed by everyone.

Anyways it’s short but I wanted to keep you up to date with what’s going on.

I will be better at keeping you posted papa. Love you!!

Daddy

What’s up Papa?!?!?!?

Well it’s January 6th I believe and I have not written to you in quit sometime. I’m good overall papa, life is crazy and I’m grateful that I have you in mine. You are in this fun stage called terrible twos. We recently went to El Centro where we hung out and you played with your cousins. We had a boring New Years. We got home on the 31st and crashed out before 11pm.

Christmas Eve and Christmas Day was good. We got to hang out in the 209 for the day where we got to see your grandma and grandpa and Lolie. You were good and they were happy to see you. Christmas Eve we were in salinas and just laid low. We opened gifts and ate some food and might have had a few drinks. You are more aware of the lights and Christmas spirit. We didn’t take you to take a picture with Santa because we know how you get and I don’t think mommy and daddy wanted to put you in that situation or get mad at ourselves for taking you. So next year you are going.

You are talking a little more now, you are definitely more independent but it makes me sad and happy that you are becoming your own person. Sad that you don’t need us as much as you did before and happy that you are gaining confidence and becoming your own crazy little person. Speech therapy has helped and everyone involved who is helping with your development.

We call you our sour patch kid cuz you are so sweet but so crazy. You run with the bottle/apple juice or anything that you are drinking and spill it everywhere then give hugs and kisses to us. It’s like how can we be mad at you?

I’ve been on break now for 3 weeks and I’m sad AF that I’m going back to work. You are a handful and get me exhausted but I wouldn’t change it for the world. I feel like we have a special connection and it’s something that I cherish and love. I feel like there’s nothing you can do that can make upset. EVEN when you throw my phone, the remote, yourself and hit us although it’s an accident I still can’t get mad at you or say anything because you will grow out of it I hope eventually.

Anyways Zebastian I love you and hope that you are happy because mommy and daddy try very hard to make sure you are a happy baby.

I love you!

Z,

I’m gonna make this short and I’m gonna catch up post soon too I promise. 

Today’s is mommy and daddy’s anniversary and it’s been an amazing 3 years. 

Today was a good day for me as I got to see you grow with your speech and I enjoy everything about you and what you bring mommy and I. 

I always want you to remember to fight Z. Fight for what you believe and fight for what’s right. Closed mouths don’t get fed so use your voice and always be humble. My boy Frank (Daniel) told me the other day stay hungry stay fed and we would use those words growing up but it reminded me to think back to my Stockton days and my playing days that you gotta stay hungry and you gotta stay focused so stay hungry Z. 

Life is too short and too beautiful to be down so please have a positive attitude like your moms and not like mine because my attitude and passion are my biggest faults but also my biggest attributes. 

Okay Z I’m going off here so I’m gonna let you go from reading this crap but remember that mommy and daddy love you. 

Gabby,

Today was a hard day for the both of us but we got each others backs and we get one another. I loved our dinner and I loved that we just chilled. I’m looking forward to the weekend and celebrating one another’s perseverance. 

Love you both to the moon and back!!

Daddy

What up Z,

Right now you are in bed crashed out. You had a long day but still managed to jump around the house,throw all of your toys on the floor, leave your golf bag in the hallway and still managed to kind of boss us around. It’s my fault that you are sick as I had a cold the last few days. I am feeling better and am hoping that you are able to bounce back just as fast. Mommy is kind of sick too so it’s all my fault. 

Yesterday I went to the store and I was approached by a young man asking for help for a mother and baby. I was like wtf what did you do you know cuz they’re some con artist out there but I spotted them as I walked into the grocery store and I immediately thought of us and our situation. I bought items that we needed then I bought the lady and baby some food/snacks. I thought what would Z like or what would he want to eat and I got them bananas, cookies, milk and a sandwich and maybe some more cookies. Point is I want you to always find it in your heart to help others and appreciate everything that you have and what we have sacrificed for you. I’m all about giving back because I was poor growing up and in college so I know the struggle so please papa be great full and love your neighbor and treat others the way you want to be treated. 

Overall papa everything is good, I’m gonna shower and get ready for bed since it’s almost midnight. I hope you are sleeping with the angels!! 

Okay last thing: we went to the mountain winery where mommy and daddy got married and had a great time at the Cafe Tacuba concert. It was amazing and I really love that place and I can’t wait for you to go with us one day. We also went to a wedding where papa got to see his friends and it was awesome. I knew I changed when I became your daddy but I knew even more the other day when I didn’t want to go out afterwards because I wanted to sleep with you in the bed. Some people ask why do you let him sleep with you guys in the bed and I say he’s only gonna be this small once and I want to enjoy waking up to him in my bed as long as I can because one day you are gonna be a big boy and have your own bed and then one day go off to college and that’s it. You might not come back home and it’s a wrap, that’s what happened to me and I still get emotional when I think about it. I didn’t think about what was going on and I miss my mom and dad more then they will ever know but it was a choice/decision that worked out but I was still a young baby when I left. 

Anyways papa sorry to get emo on you but I hope you love me the way that I love my parents because they taught me everything I know and I hope to teach you what they taught me and how to be strong and have a strong mentality because they’re haters out there but you gotta be strong and have a lot of heart and empathy for people. 

Okay Z goodnight and I love you!!

Love Daddy

What up Z,

It’s about 11pm and I can’t fall asleep yet. Today is the 16th anniversary of the 9/11 attack and 16 years ago I was in high school in Stockton. I remember your grandma told me and I thought to myself damn we’re bout to die. This was some crazy s@!@. I felt like everything stopped but it also showed how compassionate Americans can be but it also sucks that it takes something like that to bring out the empathy in everyone. 

Right now there’s a lot of crazy stuff going on, we had hurricane Harvey and Irma mess up Texas and Florida, Mexico had a huge 8.1 magnitude earthquake and the weather has been crazy. 

This is a very random post but I wanna keep you up to date with what’s going on. 

Let’s see Mommy and I went wine tasting with your Nino and Nina and some family and it was awesome. We had a lot of fun and we enjoyed having some alone time. It was your Mamas 31st b day and we had a lot of fun. 

Z you had a doctors appointment and are doing great, you are behind with your speech but that’ll get fixed since we will be getting you support. It’s a minor setback but it’s all good like I’ve said. I got a lot of confidence in you and I know you will be someone great one day. You make me feel good everyday, you do cry to get your way and throw tantrums and I say it’s okay now but you better not do that when you get older cabron (jk I love you) okay papa, prove’em wrong and don’t be as bad as me and have a chip on your shoulder but believe in yourself and you will do great!

I’m a little side tracked with stuff right now Z but know that I love you and that I’m working hard for you and mama so that I can provide for you and give you everything that you want. I’ve been telling you that you gotta work hard and be appreciative for all of the things that we get for you and that you have when you get older. The reason why I say this is because there are a lot of people who do not have all of the things that we got so we gotta be thankful for everything that we have because it can all be taken away. 

Alright Z sorry this wasn’t the nicest update but I think it’s cuz I’m a little sad with everyone that died on that day and how all of them that passed were not able to go back to their loved ones. After having my own family everything hits me a little harder. I know that my parents wouldn’t want anything to happen to me or you and mama but I think one only knows once they start their own family. That’s when I realized how much my parents loved me and cared for me. 

I’m out Z I love you to infinity and beyond!! 

Love Daddy